TIRED of smug, sexist writers acting like everyone who matters is MALE? YEARN for a narrative with LESS GENDER STEREOTYPES? The FEMINIZER BOOKMARKLET may be for you! Concocted from a potent solution of DUDEBRO TEARS and WEAPONS-GRADE MISANDRY, the FEMINIZER BOOKMARKLET will take your sexist passages and - WITH BUT A SINGLE CLICK - rid them of all but the most devious of men!
DON'T BELIEVE US? Give it a try! Just press the BIG BUTTON below, and watch in WONDER as every man in the below passage drains away! THINK IT'S A TRICK? Type in your own text, and MARVEL as Dr. Summer's WONDERFUL ALGORITHM purges it too of all things male!
His Lordship stalked into the inn, his eyes ablaze. "WHERE IS THAT DAMNABLE MAN?" he roared, hurling his cane at the stable-boy, who woke with a start that sent his tall mug of the innhouse's finest toppling from the counter. "The Emperor himself is here and I don't want to have to tell him we let the King of Traitors slip away into the night!"
"I've no notion, master," stammered the jailer, clutching his pint. "He was in the dungeons as last I knew."
"Well he's not there now," growled the Duke, "and I want to know who let the vile little bastard get out. I swear to all seven gods of the realm, I am surrounded by incompetents and fools, not trained men of the sword!"
At that very moment, the Emperor's men burst into the room, the Emperor himself following close behind. His Lordship spun and grinned manically. "Sire!" he cried, bowing deeply. "I thought you were-"
"Asleep?" boomed the Emperor, his voice drowning out the Count's. "Aye, until a few minutes ago, I was enjoying the peace and quiet known only to bachelors and the dead. Until I received word my idiot nephew had sprung your prize from his dank little cell and fled with him into the hills. Summon the hounds and ready your men! We have an arch-arsonist to hunt."
"Aye, milord!" exclaimed the Duke, immeasurably relieved, and dashed off towards the palace.
LIKE WHAT YOU SEE? The FEMINIZER BOOKMARKLET may be installed to your WEB BROWSER DEVICE by grabbing hold of the finely-crafted link below and dropping it in your bookmark bar, and PRESTO - now you can rid the web of men at your leisure!FEMINIZER X9001
*WARNING: This product may cause hysteria, light to moderate epiphanies, and late-onset gay. Do not expose to polysemy, possessive adjectives, or Contaminated material.
Feminizer Bookmarklet written by Alexis Hale, with a major upgrade by Andrea Faulds. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED, because I don't want to risk having bigots warp this code into its evil counterpart. If you use the code for good tho (i.e. social-justicey purposes) I promise won't send you a cease-and-desist or sue you or anything as long as you abide by the GPLv2. If you've found a word pair I've missed and should add, drop me a line on Twitter @velartrill.